A flag which has no political color. There is no caste or class perspective. It does not discriminate against anyone or teaches that there should be no discrimination. By making the couple’s relationship free from violence, it inspires the entire home and community to be violence free. This flag tells the family to live together, especially the husband and wife, to respect each other’s feelings, to make the marital relationship violence-free and harmonious, to respect each other’s contribution, to be responsible.

In a small stick of Bamboo which is Wrap the orange cloth in the black pipe and it is written in white colors, ‘My house is free from violence’. Above it, a picture of a small family of three (father, mothor and a daughter) can be seen inside the circle. Their faces surrounded by blue circles have a message of happiness and a happy family. The reason for the loveable relationship that can be felt between the Mr. and Mrs. of this family is that it gives the girl the impression that she is growing up in a violence-free environment with a smile on her face.

Sir looks happy and satisfied. With a bright face the wife can be assured that she is feeling safe and free from violence in the house.

Looking at the normal economic condition, behind the scenes, it is felt that the family is happy and the family can be happy and satisfied without A Palace.

These flags are committed to building violence-free families and communities, ending domestic violence, not pressure. By participating in the ‘Change Starts at Home’ project for building a violence-free community, more two hundreds couple from Nawalparasi East, Hupsekot Municipality and Vinay Triveni Municipality have declared their household violence-free and have adopted the flag written ‘Violence-free my home’ along with a five-point commitment like not tolerating violence and not committing violence.

The sole efforts of husband or wife alone cannot make the home violence-free. To improve marital relations, change must be progressed by the couple themselves. Only a violence-free marital relationship can bring happiness to the children and family and maintain balance in the family.

As the saying goes, ‘Same environment, same conduct’, children growing up in a family where there are fights between father and mother, their mental state is also filled with violence. Which encourages violence in the future as well and prepares a Group that delights in violence. That’s why it is important for their home to be free from violence for make of happiness and peace in their small brain not from luggage of cruel torture and pain. In the process of blooming flowers, this flag is helping to create a violence-free environment.

The ‘Change Starts at Home’ project also envisioned violence-free relationships, violence-free households and communities. Accordingly, more than two hundred families of Hoopsekot and Vinay Triveni were joined in this campaign in starting phase. Affected by the project that conducted the program with the participation of couples in particular, after declaring their homes violence-free and placing the flag, those who were attracted to learn from them and build a violence-free relationship also increased.

Couples who have made a commitment that they will not commit violence, will not tolerate it, or will not watch it happen, will not watch a fight in the neighborhood. One such couple is Maniram Musahar and Indu Musahar who live in Binay-Tribeni-7 Bankatti. Maniram and Indu stopped speaking for three years. But now the relationship is good. This couple, who has reached a state like water, is now intimate, devoted and happy with each other. They want to see that not only themselves, but also the neighboring couples are always happy.

“At first we used to fight, the neighbors used to be happy. Now the neighbors fight, we don’t watch quarrel, we remind them for get togetherness. Because of the change starts at home, many people like me have changed their thinking. I used to wonder why I had to go to someone else’s fight, but the violence is not about me or someone else’, Maniram said – ‘Violence in the neighborhood affects my family too. Therefore, if there is a fight somewhere, I will remind them to handshake.

In 4 wards of Hupsekot Rural Municipality and 6 wards of Vinayi Triveni Rural Municipality, the project was operated from ‘Change Starts at home’. During the implementation of the project, a Violence Free Community Campaign Committee (VFC) was formed in one municipality and 12 wards. By involving more than 200 couples, the project encouraged them to listen to radio dramas, movies and street dramas and participate in group discussions and other social activities. In this way, the participants not only adopted what they learned from group discussions and other social awareness activities, but the participants helped to spread it to the community and other wards and villages along with other family members, relatives, and friends.

Those who took the step of change from themselves and declared the whole house free of violence, were given a flag in the presence of the local people’s representatives.

1 All the female members of the house including the daughter-in-law are equal in this house. They are treated and respected as full and equal members.

2 Here there is no love for daughter and distance from daughter-in-law. You are a woman and you have to work, I am a man and you don’t have to work, we don’t have to bring water, tea, food wherever we are told. Everyone in the house is treated equally and mutually, with joint participation in the decision making of the house, equal distribution of work.

3 Violence or abuse of any kind against any member of this household will not be tolerated under any circumstances.

4 As a family we will listen fairly and respect and support those who experience violence in the community and without blaming anyone.

5 We understand that excessive use of alcohol can lead to violence and distress. Therefore, we are committed to reducing the consumption of alcohol and to support the family and others in the community in the same way. with these five commitment/ pledges they hoisted flags at their houses and pasted stickers stating the pledges. With the help of VFC, meetings and interactions were held at the village, ward and rural municipality levels, orientations were held with the elected public representatives and community leaders along with the meeting.

With the impact of the project, 1,168 households in Binayi Triveni and Hupsekot rural areas have declared violence-free houses and put up flags. According to Bhesraj Khanal, VFC president of Vinay Triveni Rural Municipality Ward No. 6, the flag with the inscription “My house free from violence” has been seen to have a very positive effect.

“There will be a trend in the society that others will learn by seeing what one does, accordingly, after placing the flag in one’s house, we have seen that the interest and attachment of other families also increased” chairperson Khanal said – thus the effect of the flag is increasing, almost 300 people from our ward have declared their houses free of violence. They have put up the flag with commitment. The work of bringing the flag to some of the remaining houses is also going on.

Even the guests are surprised to see the flag of the violence-free house. Not only that, they ask with interest why it is kept? What does it do? They get answers to their questions from the behavior of the people in the house with the flag and the violence-free environment of that house.

“Guests who come to the house asking “why the flag and stickers are there, what kind of flag it is” Khanal said – we have not had such a program yet, it is good to have this campaign, we would have been able to join this campaign, many people said that we also want to declare our home to violence free. and also It has been found that those who tell about the flag have become more civilized.

Khanal said that he is getting help and support from the ward office and municipality has also continuously monitored the impact of this program and promised to provide necessary support in preventing violence. According to him, Ward No. 6 has also allocated a budget of 1 lakh rupees for building a violence-free community.

The effect on the couples is the same after Change Starts at home program. A man in the village used to come home drunk and beat his wife, he used to shout yes in the village, after listening to the program and after continuous monitoring, discussions and meetings, there has been a big change in his habits, Khanal says that now their couple is finally in good harmony and this is a model. The couple has become successful in the household and business.

Change for Violence-Free Relationships: Pleased Couples and Happier Families