I do not want to sleep with my wife…

Kathmandu (Pahichan) March 7 – I was born in a rural village of Bhojpur district in 2032 BC. I was born in Bhramin family. I was a little bit different since early days. I used to use mother’s cosmetics. I was attracted to the works of mother, and later I used to work with my sister-in-law. I was fun of doing the works assigned to women.  I used to wear the clothes of women. I used to learn how to wear sari. When I took a photograph in women’s dress, my father turned fierce and beat me.

It was one of the immemorial moments of my life. In my life boys were not my friends. Goma Pariyar (name changed) was my closet friend.  I was too close with friends (mainly girls) with whom I used to play and eat together. It was very difficult for society to digest such things. I was a son of a rich father.

There was perception in village that boy should prefer boy as friends. So, people started to backbite. However, it was by fun to use cosmetics, wear red dress, and have a long hair and to do works inside the home. Society was against my will and people have already started to raise voices against me. There was not a proper environment to go school. People used to call me a man of infertility. Father used to beat me for getting attracted to women dress.

With a purpose of correcting me, there was a talk of marriage. So, I left home in 16 years and there were no one with me. I reached Darjiling. There I met Surendra Das(name changed) and he was like me. His name was Targen and he named me as Jisica. During the night I used to wear girl’s dress and in day time I used to wear the dresses of boy. We lived together me as wife and he as a wife for two years.

Police arrested use and they sent us to Nepal. I do not know his whereabouts. When I came to Nepal, I was not interested to go their again. I got a job of peon. Later, I came to know that mother is suffering from Lung cancer so I went home. After 12 years, I was promoted to upper level.  Mother wept. Mother started to force me to marry.

To keep mother happy, I was compelled to marry. I married but I have not slept with my wife and I am not interested. Now, I am retired and I have all things but my heart is not happy. As saying that birds of same feature flock together, I want to make friend like. The unfortunate thing of my life is that I cannot disclose my identity. I expectation is that I would get support from you.